"Have you ever fallen for a hobbyist so deep that..."
You can't take it? Ladies of course I'll be waiting on your answer. Guys has it happened to you by a provider? I'm sure this is a boring question to some and has been brought up hundrends of times in the past.
2. "RE: Have you ever fallen for a hobbyist so deep that..."
In response to message #1
Nope. I've made some wonderful friends that I have several things in common with 'off the clock' and I genuinely value their friendship but I will never allow myself to cross the line and fall for anyone. Business needs to be kept separate from your heart no matter what. That's my philosophy anyway.
3. "RE: Have you ever fallen for a hobbyist so deep that..."
In response to message #0
LAST EDITED ON 03-Aug-10 AT 06:45 PM (PST)
Sure, the question has been done before, but we all like to brag, so what the hell. Why not?
Had a years-long affair with a fbsm provider I met long ago. After our third or fourth session she offered a no-strings FWB arrangement. She intiated and pursued the affair, which at the outset was off-putting...in fact, when she offered it at first I bolted like a scared rabbit and didn't connect with her for about 4 months. But shortly I lightened up and saw the beauty of what was being offered to me...(and no, smartasses, I'm not talking about free pussy...though that clearly wasn't bad...)
The beauty lay in the fact that she was absolutely present, caring, and gifted in helping people crack open their own souls, peer inside, and let out the goodness within...and in so doing helped me learn to be as present and caring as she was. Yeah, I know...sounds like airy-fairy bullshit, and I tend to deal in the empirical world, but you know something...this was abso-fucking-lutely the real deal.
It turned out to be in many ways the best relationship of my life. It happened as I was ending my twenties and really coming into my own strength, but not completely clear on where I was going. She helped me channel that energy into some pretty great things. And...in terms of being a lover she helped me kick things up a notch or three--again, her openness and the fact she accepted her own (huge) sexual appetite created a space for lots of off-the-charts sex. We were *very* compatible in bed.
And...bonus...we completely loved each other. I grew so much in those years, and she did as well, though frankly I got the better end of that bargain. It was not without its complications--we were both married to other people at the time--but for the most part we handled things with grace and humor. And lots of sex.
What did not turn out so well was that after we had ended our affair she introduced me to someone else,thinking she was doing me a favor. THAT person would go on to create unimaginable havoc in my life and it would eventually require legal action to make her go away...but that's for another time/post.
I had two other providers offer similar arrangements over the years (e.g., Hey, I like seeing you as my client, but I think I'd prefer you to be my lover...wanna try it?) But after the first one I was pretty sure that nothing would ever measure up, so I politely declined anything more than the occasional dinner date. But I still wonder about one of them...
6. "RE: Have you ever fallen for a hobbyist so deep that..."
In response to message #0
I fell for a provider 3 years ago, and after everything that has happened we are still together. She is still providing to make ends meet, but we've learned that this is a service, and you have to separate your heart when your working appose to being with the person you care for.
7. "RE: Have you ever fallen for a hobbyist so deep that..."
In response to message #0
After many years provinding on and off, and being able to keep my business separated from my personal life, I have to admit that I fallen inlove, cazy inlove with a hobbist. I fell inlove like a teenager, but he is married and there is no way things will work. He penalized me for my business without understanding my circumstances. Eventhough, we are inlove it will never be possible to mantain a relationship because of his situation and my business... The last couple of months have been emotionally painful but I learn a lot of this experience... We connected in a way that I have never ever connected with someone not even with my ex-husband(when I was married). He has been the best sex I've ever had... Sex was part of the reason I fallen inlove with him... I know it sounds pathetic, but its true. I thought I found my better half with him.............. I thought he was made just for me!
But he was not made for me because he is already taken...
I forgot about the boundries and this is what happened... very painful experience! Dont recommended it at all.
8. "RE: Have you ever fallen for a hobbyist so deep that..."
In response to message #7
LAST EDITED ON 05-Aug-10 AT 11:28 AM (PST)
Thanx for all the responses so far. Thank you for sharing about the married man situation. We have all been there. NO, they won't leave their wives especially if the wife is the one who has the money and power. They just use escorts to get by and then make us fall for them in silly ways!
10. "RE: Have you ever fallen for a hobbyist so deep that..."
In response to message #9
You can't help who you fall in love with.Whomever it is.In this situation it'll be harder for sure.You have to ask yourself what or who's more important and even still probably will need to find some middle ground to truly make it work.
11. "RE: Have you ever fallen for a hobbyist so deep that..."
In response to message #10
LAST EDITED ON 19-Aug-10 AT 08:35 PM (PST)
I have. I loved this man so fucking much that it was insane. I mean I gave it my all. Not sure if he felt the same. But in the end it just couldn't work. But I've learned a great deal about myself and what I'm able to tolerate and accept in a relationship. Oh well, just another chapter in my past.
12. "RE: Have you ever fallen for a hobbyist so deep that..."
In response to message #11
Married men are the best clients providing you don't get in a crazy relationship with one! We can send them home...
Maried men in REAL life PLEASE stay away from them too! I dated one for 5 years, it's a long story. He lied to me when we met. I didn't know he was married. His family came to me and informed me. I wanted to break it off but I was into too deep. He promised to divorce her and you can guess what happened!
Some hobbyists will make you fall for them to get free luvin' DON'T do it! In the end you will feel horrible, useless, listless! It is hard to pick yourself up off the ground. The sex may be good! I advise you can find sex anywhere anytime. Woman have the POWER!!! BTW it was fun talking to you in chat last week!
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, 05-Aug-10, 00:55 AM, (7)
Make her job easier-be a fuckable john.
Heather 