Anyway we have a circle of friends and a new guy (friend of a friend) was introduced. I recall the first time I set eyes on him I was shocked at how attractive he was and immediately left the room and avoided him. Turns out he did the same, avoided me.

We were both instantly attracted to each other in and yet it was so awkward. He thought I didn't like him and I thought the same of him. Eventually we were forced to talk to each other (socially) and something totally clicked. We "got" each other. We fell in love with the others mind and how the other thought and spoke and talked for hours. At other parties we always ended up talking all night. Even then we still avoided any eye contact or being too close to the other.

This last week we were left alone and the first few hours were gruelingly awkward and tense. After some time we decided to wait outside for the others but it was really cold. I’m not sure who made the first move but eventually we got close to stay warm. The moment we touched I literally had the air sucked out of my lungs and it was like an electrical shock shot though my body leaving me with a euphoric tingling. I have never felt anything like this before. Within an hour we were kissing and touching each other like a neither one of us had ever been with another person before, like it was magic. It was so intense and yet familiar and safe. It seemed like we were to cosmic puzzle pieces that just fit. Before I left he told me he loved me and I felt the same, it was not weird at all.

We are both married, not happily but married. Neither of us have experienced this sensation before and it’s beyond intoxicating, it’s addictive. I have not been able to think of anything or anyone else since then.

Everything that happened that night was the most romantic, perfect and unlikely thing imaginable.

I have seen this happen to other people, but it’s different when it’s yourself I guess. I can’t imagine how he and I could ever make it work but at the same time I feel like I would do almost anything to feel the way I do with him. There are kids and complications that make this not worth perusing but how do you walk away from something like that?

He's my Edward...

Has this happened to anyone else?
If so, what the heck did you do?
What was the outcome?
Will it pass if I pretend it didn’t happen?
Does it get worse?

Jolie Fair
Relax, it's just the internet.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hUKBuAkr4Lg

Live. Love. Play. Relax.

So, who was asking about LTR relationships with providers?

culo is a culo

If so, what the heck did you do? Smartened up and either fixed my marriage or got a divorce (i did the latter) - but not because of falling for someone else, but because i realized if i could fall for someone else, i had no business being married.

What was the outcome? Still single and on RB. Tried dating the person after divorce, but magic wasn't the same when it wasn't taboo and where we weren't both stuck in a loveless marriage. Amazing how that works.

Will it pass if I pretend it didn’t happen? You can never pretend it didn't happen. Chances are it will again, you are human.

Does it get worse? Depends on whether you let it or not.

There was some kind of chemistry that was overpowering. It was so intoxicating I think I would have given up everything for her. If she would have agreed to have my child I would not have stopped to consider the ramifications (no pun intended).

We would start meeting whenever I had to stay overnight for work. She would come to the hotel for a session and just end up staying for the night (gratis). There was an intimacy that was magnetic. She finally said she could not see me any longer and it was tough to take but I knew she was right.

Sparks flying and palpitations and absolute chemistry is so real and so rare it's very difficult for me to say it's smart to ignore it.

Keeping this new amazing passion as a side venture while both of you are in failing permanent primary relationships seems ill-fated at best though. Seems like this is maybe one of those potentially pivotal self-assessment times to sort through values and long term dreams.

Nobody's going to have the 1 "right answer" for you, but the other post that said realizing you have the potential to fall in love with someone other than the marital partner seems to me to be absolutely pure wisdom, and thus potentially a reason to figure out if you want to fix your marriage or just tolerate it.

Because of so many moving parts involved, including families of both spouses in both marriages, plus the stresses of ending either/both marriages, it seems pretty damn unrealistic to think those stresses wouldn't steal the thrills you're having right now and possibly kill them entirely.

Personally, I know I'm so appreciative of unforced natural chemistry and soul connections that disregarding them when they happen isn't really something I'd be able to honestly recommend.

Have you talked with him about it or what he wants?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJR62vsAg-0

Live. Love. Play. Relax.

I have an elderly male neighbor that was spotted pouring something on my rose bushes. I did not want to believe it; I dismissed it and replied that he was just helping me take care of my garden. Now that all my rose bushes are brown and yellow he knocks on my door a few times a week bringing me flowers. I’m starting to think that this was his motive all along.

I forgive him for killing my rose bushes (because he’s elderly) but I don’t want to accept the flowers anymore.

How or should I tell him that I’m just not comfortable being neighborly with him?

TIA,
Jillian Bailey

This isn't a tween fairy tail. There are real lives involved here that will be altered forever by your actions. Think about K and M. Is this the best thing for them? I think they deserve parents who are willing to try to work it out for the sake of the kids. What have you done to improve your marriage? Have YOU gone to therapy, marriage counseling, a psychiatrist / psychologist? Marriage is a two way street and it doesn't sound like you've done a lot to keep your side up.

Now you are infatuated with someone new who is a friend of your husband which makes things awkward. Your husband must feel very hurt by all of this, confused and broken hearted. I'm sure he isn't a saint and there are lots of things that could be worked on but he's been with you for 16 years and put up with your crazy life style. He's been there through your terrible drug addiction, dealt with your widely changing moods, seen you start and fail at many jobs, put up with your insane family etc...

Divorce is not the answer to your problems, yet. It's just a way for you to avoid trying to make things better and become a happier / healthier person. Go to your home and look into K's and M's eyes and tell them that you love someone else and that it's best to ditch their dad. Tell them you had an affair, be honest with them since that is what you preach so often. You took on a huge responsibility 13 years ago when you had your first child. You owe it to them to try harder to improve yourself and work on your marriage for the foreseeable future.

It still may be that you come to the same conclusion that divorce is best but at least you will have given it your all to try and fix it. Don't throw everything away based on this pure lust you feel for the new guy. You are very smart so use those smarts to better yourself and your marriage instead of letting your rampant narcissism guide your life.