Please, no BS of, "Your lucky man, what is the problem?" This is a serious question.

My advice is that it can't last. Age difference trumps love.

So enjoy every moment, and try to accumulate enough
happy memories that will sustain you once the inevitable
heartbreak occurs.

It won't end with a bang but with a whimper (i.e. no
big break up, just one day you'll find she's gone off
with some other, younger, guy). Thing is, she'll genuinely
want to remain friends (because she appreciates your mentoring)
and won't understand why you're upset. But she also won't
have much time for you as a friend because she's busy
with her new guy.

I'm 29 now and dating someone my own age. None of the 40+ men could match his level of introspection, his desire to communicate, nor his conflict resolution skills. I still think older men are sexy and appealing, but my days of looking specifically for older men are over.

Sure, there are a few fluke cases where the attraction between a young woman and an older male has nothing to do with age, but what I've found is that men who *habitually* date women a lot younger than themselves are doing so for a reason, and when they say the "looks" of the younger girl is the real reason, I just take that as a symptom of his lack of introspection.

AK-47

Now taking new clients today, Sunday: http://forum.myredbook.com/dcforum2/DCForumID20/29513.html

All in love is fair

Live and fuck

Of course, the older one gets, the less likely an age gap will make much difference. I think a 31 year old dating a 49 year old will have fewer problems than a 21 year old dating a 39 year old- generally speaking that is. Most 21 year olds are still very green behind the ears- just learning how to get along in the world without being under her parent's wing.

I would say that a 19 year old and a 39 year old could get along fine, but in your case it sounds like it may not. You said there is friction, and she likened being with you to going out with her father. That doesn't sound good to me, but I could be mistaken. It would be easier to make a blanket statement if we all matured (psychologically, emotionally and even physically) at the same rate, but we don't.

If you two get along without having to deal with all the head trips and rollercoaster of emotions that are so common in women her age, then great, you may do fine- so long as your sex drive doesn't dwindle too much too soon. A woman hits her peak at 30, so you can expect to be fucking like rabbits at the age of 50, unless children become part of the equation, in which case I have no idea how that works.

Of course my taste in men changed drastically over the years, and the kind of men I liked at the age of 19 are nothing like the men I like now. She still has a lot of growth ahead of her, and is likely to go through several transformations before she settles into herself as a woman. My guess is that she will want to date a few more men before settling down, but that is not always the case.

If you are just looking for compainionship for the time being, and the reason behind this inquiry is that you are questioning whether it may be a disaster- then I'd say go for it if it feels right. It will most likely involve a few headaches and a lot of fun. If you are hoping, however, that this will be a lasting, long-term commitment, I'd say the odds are stacked up against you. True love at 19 always feels strong enough to last a lifetime, but never seems to make it past a year or two. If you can do it without throwing your heart at her feet, and simply enjoy being with her in the moment, and say goodbye when the time has come without too much despair, you'll be fine.

ƒK

We got along just fine, but had little in common. I was definitely the father figure.

We had different tastes in music, clothes, food and she just wasn't mature enough to emotionally stimulate me. She was in love with me, but really she was in love with my maturity. I had to end it, but she would still be here today if I had chose that path. She was mature for her age, but still too young. I had more in common with her mom, but mom wasn't as good looking. ( yah, I'm shallow)

She did stimulate me in other ways , but even that got old.

The worst part was in public. We were buying something and were discussing at the counter if we really wanted what we were buying, then the clerk told her..."listen to your father" ouch!

BTW, you are a lucky man, enjoy it while it lasts. I got to teach mine many fun things.

Peace-Out,
MOJO

It depends on what you are looking for and what she is looking for. Have you talked to her about the outlook of this relationship?

If the love is restricted by the age difference, maybe it's not the love (true love) you ultimately want or searching for. That's why I don't see how some people can only confine their dating candidate pool by race, height, etc. Sure, if you tell yourself enough that he/she is the one, I am sure your love can be nurtured by the mental illusion. Then there is really no point to search for true love, soulmate, etc. Because you can pretty much make anybody one.

jorge

As others have pointed out if you gravitate to
just younger women, then there is some issue within you.

She on the other hand seems to be having problems with
the relationship as she mentions things about it to you.

In my past I dated and married someone older than my by 6 years,
the age difference was never a problem.

I dated someone 7 years younger, the age difference was a
real problem.

I was with someone 11 years younger than me, she seemed
to be more with it, and the age difference was never
an issue or brought up in the relationship.

It all has to do with how you both see things and if
it is an issue with each of you. If you don't see her as
a kid and she doesn't see you as "Daddy" then you probably
do have something going, if not then it is temporary at best...THX

1. She has likened you to her father (bad sign). This means that she equates you as such in her mind, and while she may be fine with the sex for now, there are probably a few issues she needs to work out... especially if she still lives at home, or has only been living away from her parents for a year or so. It takes a few years to really discover what living on your own is like and what it takes to be in control of your own life. If she hasn't figured it out yet (and very few 19 year olds have), moving in with you would do more harm than good.

2. At 19, you do NOT know who you are yet. People change the most between 18 and 28, so who she is now is not who she will be in a few months. She may be fantastic now, but it would not be very realistic to expect her to stay the same.

It also doesn't help that she is liberal and you are conservative... I'm not saying liberals and conservatives can't get along, but she's got the idealism of youth and you've got the cynicism of experience. Is she going to seem so beguiling when she wants to drag you to an anti-war protest where everyone is against the republicans? It's small, but something to consider...

I used to date someone much older than me, and it was fun at first but eventually I realized we were at completely different places: I was going to school and wanted to see the world, he'd already done that and wanted to buy a house and settle. I was still convinced that I could make a difference in the world, he'd go into condecending speeches about how I'd know better further on down the road. If I accidentally spilled some wine on the carpet I would laugh and find some paper towels, he would run in with the spot cleaner and think it childish of me to find wine on a cream carpet funny.

Etc, etc.

As many have already said, I'd say have fun for now but don't expect this to be permanent. Good luck to you

Cora

http://www.sweetcoraline.com/faq.html

In these parts, however, he would be viewed as a dirty old man at best and a cradle-robber at worst.

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"The fear of drowning, bankruptcy, or plunging into flames from an aircraft is less frightening than appearing like an idiot in print."