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sexyjonz sexyjonz rating
Member since 5-Feb-07
179 posts, 8 feedbacks, 14 points		 16-Aug-10, 07:59 PM (PST)
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"Somewhat Frustrating..."
 
I have been on Red Book for more than 2 years or so and I have had the pleasure of spending time with some very popular, four and five-star providers. Unfortunately, as of late, I have made appointments with a few providers that have not answered the door when I showed up. Also, when speaking to them on the phone I have made appointments only to have them refuse to provide me services because I am black.

I will not mention who they are and do not really fault them for their preference in providing services to certain ethnic classes. However, the problem I have is each time we have enjoyed a pleasant conversation. When I ask the question, "Do you provide services to men of color?" They majority of them answer no and it appears to be an epidemic in the Central Valley, specifically Fresno.

I am wondering what is going on? Has there been a rash of bad experiences with black men? I am highly-educated, very well-spoken, well-dressed, etc. This is not a rant, but would really like to hear from providers regarding the phenomenon. Thanks.

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Leglover15 Leglover15 rating
Member since 10-Sep-08
2438 posts, 27 feedbacks, 51 points		 16-Aug-10, 08:50 PM (PST)
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1. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #0
 
They may be generalizing and thinking, since you are a black man you will come over with your gun and try to bring them to your stable. I realize that not all men, or men of a certain ethnic group, are looked at as being pimps. Perhaps some women are just being too overly protective and would rather not take any chance with a man of color.

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balls_deep balls_deep rating
Member since 26-Oct-02
353 posts, 7 feedbacks, 12 points		 16-Aug-10, 08:53 PM (PST)
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2. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #0
 
   LAST EDITED ON 16-Aug-10 AT 08:54 PM (PST)
 
In short read this thread below..
http://forum.myredbook.com/cgi-bin/dcforum2/dcboard.pl?az=show_thread&om=16808&forum=DCForumID25

Some will say preference and honestly some providers will just not see black men regardless so best to just move on in this profession unlike a job interview or buying a home bias. I've also been told by a few well reviewed providers that some quote "white hobbyist" inbox/email them not to see black men for if they do this will hurt their business. Thus the beat goes on...

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805MassageBabe 805MassageBabe rating
Member since 6-Oct-07
3049 posts, 90 feedbacks, 173 points		 16-Aug-10, 11:06 PM (PST)
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3. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #2
 
   Anyone who would refuse to see you, Sexyjonz, is an idiot!

Definitely their loss. Sorry that you've been treated so rudely.


xoxox
MB

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sexyjonz sexyjonz rating
Member since 5-Feb-07
179 posts, 8 feedbacks, 14 points		 16-Aug-10, 11:27 PM (PST)
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4. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #3
 
Hey Miss MB...

Thanks for the kind words... It has been a long time. How are you?

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arayam209
Member since 14-Jan-09
227 posts, Rate arayam209		 17-Aug-10, 02:01 AM (PST)
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5. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #0
 
   Hey There Sexyjonz,

Well, first I want to appologize on behalf of the ignorance in society today... Sometimes I think that either I possess too much common sense or the world around me lacks it!!!

Although SAFETY is FIRST & each individual provider is going to have their own comfortability levels or personal policies that probably makes sense to them IN THEIR WORLD, but the fact is that normaly people might not think like that cause thats not a concern in THEIR WORLD, make sense? But, I'm thinking thats probably a rule enforced by ones "MANAGER, DADDY, PIMP" whatever WE're calling HIM these days) & he doesnt want to loose his "LADY, MEAL TICKET, BITCH, HOE" (whatever WE're called these days) to the next poor pathetic soul... All based, again, on ignorance & thats unfortunate!

Personaly, Race isn't the issue... For me to refuse service would be based on his IMMATURITY &/or his Lack of RESPECT! If you dont know how to speak to a Lady as a Gentleman should, then it's not worth my time to have to deal with. Regardless of ones Ethnicity, whether WHITE, BLACK, YELLOW OR BROWN every Race has its share of garbage... If a woman does not have the ability to determine the character of a person within an initial conversation then she should be MANAGED, RIGHT..? I dont get it, but maybe I'm just not supposed to...

Black Men Need Love Too!!! So... FOR A GOOD TIME YOU CAN CALL ME ANYTIME @ (209) 474- 7854 Thanx, Araya ...& GOOD LUCK!


http://forum.myredbook.com/dcforum2/User_files2/fya8b75z5we4i78q.jpg

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claude29 claude29 rating
Member since 25-Oct-09
349 posts, 8 feedbacks, 14 points		 17-Aug-10, 02:47 AM (PST)
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6. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #5
 
Most people, I mean the majority, above the age 50 went to segregated school sand grew-up in that sick and ignorant world of racism.
Most providers, most people also, have parents that went to segregated schools. Meaning they were brought up in homes that use race as an excuse to victimize others. They were and are surrounded by sick people.
Also know that racists are usually the less privileged group in any society. I mean those who cry about Mexican taking Americans jobs are the poor ones-not the rich employers who profit from it. It is therefore expected that the majority of providers have racist tendencies since they are economically less privileged or come from a less privileged backgrounds-except those who enjoy the service
Many new providers are told to stay away from blacks unless if they want to be pimped.
Indeed many Caucasian hobbyist of racist background hate the very idea of a black man messing with a white girl, whom they consider “property” . Note that white girls are known as ‘property’ in white street and biker gangs, etc.
Many providers have had unpleasant dealing with some retarded pimp of color. The majority of providers has had relationship with blacks and still deal with them.
Primps, especially black, prohibit their girls from seeing black. So many of the lady who refuse to see you have black daddies in the background.
Many wanna be pimps constantly text providers trying to talk them into being pimped. It is therefore logical for provider to stay away.
There is also the stereotype of black men being large and sexually aggressive-many girls do not want that. This also explains why hobbyists with finger-size dicks would tell providers not to see blacks.
Pornography has actually reinforced this image-how many black pornographers have tiny dicks?
The notion of preference is BS. The fact is that in a provider-hobbyist relationship only money and service matter.
Finally, providers and hobbyists are representative of society: there are criminals, people who have hurt other people, racists, idiots, mentally sick, and people who are decent humans, educated, smart, well brought up, mentally stable and know that no one race is better than another.
At the end do not take it personal. Honesty girls with those sorts of restrictions do not worth seeing. In most cases they have serious issues like lack of education, bad companies, pimps or daddies, locked-up in another world, and do not regret hurting another person.
Sorry about the lengthy post

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justmeinvisalia justmeinvisalia rating
Member since 7-Jul-08
817 posts, 15 feedbacks, 30 points		 17-Aug-10, 07:15 AM (PST)
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7. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #6
 
Ignorance knows no bounds..

While a provider has the right to share her body with whom she chooses...she needs to be up front with her tastes in her ad or at the very least in her screening process.

If she is not up front and turns you away at the door because of race
that's just disrespect and there is no room for it in a business relationship.

The only way anyone learns in business is to hit them in the pocket book...so I think you owe it to the community as a whole to out the offenders...

Disrespect me..and I put you on blast. .


justmeinvisalia
aka DOM
DirtyOMan

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Be_Dazzled Be_Dazzled rating
Member since 7-May-08
3129 posts, 100 feedbacks, 191 points		 17-Aug-10, 09:24 AM (PST)
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10. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #7
 
LAST EDITED ON 17-Aug-10 AT 09:26 AM (PST)
 
I think you owe it to the community as a whole to out the offenders...
Miss Be_dazzled agrees. We have every right to be picky but some of these ladies don't realize when they limit themselves to a certain race or color they are being very racist and they will fight you to the end saying they are'nt! I always just say 'I like boys'.
Hey sexyjonz, I see your in the CV! Hmmmm......

Heather
Your Pleasure is My Pleasure!

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sexyjonz sexyjonz rating
Member since 5-Feb-07
179 posts, 8 feedbacks, 14 points		 17-Aug-10, 09:04 PM (PST)
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17. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #10
 
Heather,

Yes I am in the CV... I am not sure that outing these ladies will change their perspectives. It is something they will have to come to grips with.

I will have to look you up when I am in your area.

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sexyjonz sexyjonz rating
Member since 5-Feb-07
179 posts, 8 feedbacks, 14 points		 17-Aug-10, 06:15 PM (PST)
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15. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #5
 
Thanks for the encouraging words and support. Yes I would agree that some are very short-sighted. I will have to look you up.

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sexyjonz sexyjonz rating
Member since 5-Feb-07
179 posts, 8 feedbacks, 14 points		 17-Aug-10, 09:00 PM (PST)
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16. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #5
 
Thanks for the encouranging words and yes I agree there are many short-sighted small minded people.

I will have to take you up on your offer.

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ramfan11111 ramfan11111 rating
Member since 12-Aug-09
566 posts, 11 feedbacks, 18 points		 17-Aug-10, 07:32 AM (PST)
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8. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #0
 
   All I can say is don't give up. If the ladies you do see will give you glowing refrences maybe that will help change the minds of the one's who hesitate to see you. Change is a slow process.

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willthethrill willthethrill rating
Member since 20-Mar-04
833 posts, 14 feedbacks, 24 points		 17-Aug-10, 09:21 AM (PST)
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9. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #8
 
Jonz, Hang in there. One of the great things about RB is all the choices concerning ethnicity we get to make. I agree, a provider may have had a bad experience and she should state in her ad up front, she does not see whomever and leave it at that. When they turn you away at the door or they are not honest up front that is unprofessional, it's best just to move on. There are so many beautiful ladies on this site, you learn lots and make good friends. I have to admit, born and raised in Lodi I had never been with a lady of color before going into college, etc. Just the way it was. Hopefully you learn from that and open your eyes, listen and learn. There is a whole bunch of fun stuff out there to experience. Good luck and be safe.

Will GO GIANTS!!

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805MassageBabe 805MassageBabe rating
Member since 6-Oct-07
3049 posts, 90 feedbacks, 173 points		 17-Aug-10, 10:00 AM (PST)
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12. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #9
 
   I'm doing well, thanks sj! And I will gladly provide a reference for you to someone you'd like to see. My suggestion would be to contact them via inbox 1st and let them know from the beginning that you're black and offer solid references at the same time. If they don't get back to you- you probably wouldn't want to see them anyway because they're likely ignorant, pimped or not interested in providing quality service to quality men such as yourself.

Take care and good luck! I'll be back over your direction in a week or so, if nothing else, maybe we can get together for lunch at you-know-where!? ha, ha.

xoxox
MB

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kreamyitalian kreamyitalian rating
Member since 19-Mar-10
203 posts, 3 feedbacks, 6 points		 17-Aug-10, 09:53 AM (PST)
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11. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #0
 
   sweetie, i'd love to see you! give me a call. xoxo Kreamyitalian xoxo

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Notyoavgjoe Notyoavgjoe rating
Member since 17-May-10
324 posts, 6 feedbacks, 12 points		 17-Aug-10, 12:41 PM (PST)
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13. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #11
 
   You see, Jonz, there are plenty of girls out there who are willing to see you. Never you mind about those who won't. I had two bad sessions with Brooklyn and will never see her again. She asked me to lose her number. I asked her what I had done wrong and she was not able to tell me. Should I surmise that it was because I am hispanic? Geez, I really don't know. I simply know that I will not ever waste my time with her again. There are plenty of girls out there who do want my money and I've had some fantastic times with them.
We all have bad experiences from time to time. I'm sure you would have had a worst time if they changed the rules once they had your money squirreled away. I've had this happen to me.
I agree, it would be easier if providers posted this all in advance, still, this will not always protect you from a bad experience.
Ultimately, our personal preferences will always trump all else. I prefer to see caucasian or hispanic young ladies with hot bodies and cute faces, perfect teeth. I find it interesting that we all have preferences which we are willing to pay for, whether it be a younger age, tighter bodies, there are even some who prefer meatier chicks. Like I've said before, this does not make us bad people or racists. I have paid for black and asian providers in the past but those instances are rare. Kinda like going to the smorgasbord, sometimes you feel like having something different.
There is enough for everybody.
Joe

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sexyjonz sexyjonz rating
Member since 5-Feb-07
179 posts, 8 feedbacks, 14 points		 17-Aug-10, 09:05 PM (PST)
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18. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #11
 
Ok... Thanks.

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Letsplaybutucantstay Letsplaybutucantstay rating
Member since 1-Jul-10
152 posts, 1 feedbacks, 2 points		 17-Aug-10, 02:38 PM (PST)
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14. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #0
 
   Hey Jonz , Just keep hobbing RB brother, Way to many great providers to let a few frustrate you, We have to remember that some of these same providers in the real world wouldn't give us the time of day with out our donation so don't let their choice bother you to much. I had a provider tell me years back that she didnt see men of color and didnt have that in her ad, because she said she could tell by their voice, Now that's real ignorance!

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sexyjonz sexyjonz rating
Member since 5-Feb-07
179 posts, 8 feedbacks, 14 points		 17-Aug-10, 09:08 PM (PST)
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19. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #0
 
Thanks my fellow RB brothers and you all made very valid points regarding this. The frustration is due to this just beginning to occur. I have been hobbying for at least 2+ years and have met some very popular providers in times past.

I took some time away and have encountered at least four that have not seen me in the last 2-months alone. I was very polite and said thanks for letting me know and moved on. I do hope some read cause them to think.

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Sassynfun4u Sassynfun4u rating
Member since 30-Mar-07
3680 posts, 130 feedbacks, 238 points		 17-Aug-10, 10:31 PM (PST)
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20. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #19
 
sorry this is still happening to you jon... I guess somethings NEVER change... Thats the Sad part!

2 yrs from the last time you posted this... Yes SOoooo sad that some girls just don't get it..
Best of luck to you

http://forum.myredbook.com/cgi-bin/dcforum2/dcboard.pl?az=show_thread&om=8976&forum=DCForumID25


XOOXO
Sass
Sassafied Is The Way To Be! Live Laugh & Love

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sailorgirl10 sailorgirl10 rating
Member since 28-Mar-10
163 posts, 4 feedbacks, 6 points		 20-Aug-10, 06:06 PM (PST)
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23. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #20
 
sailorgirl

GREENS the Color for me $$$$$$$$
Thats crazy, i agree they are missing out, the providers should post that as a negotiation in their add...that they have a preference of color...i don't i just have a preference to Assholes, and they can be any color....lol i don't again see the point of not placing that in the add, so nobody's time is wasted.....too me everyone any color has the right color for me, that is GREEN$$$$$$$$$


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xcellent
Member since 25-Jul-09
55 posts		 18-Aug-10, 00:33 AM (PST)
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21. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #0
 
   In the end we just have to get over it & move on. I have had it happen to me. Made it to the door & told I don't see black guys. Drive into the parking lot, get a frantic call as the provider spots me out the window & asked what nationality am I? American is my nationality but African-American my ethnicity. I have asked politely over the phone do you see African Americans to avoid wasting time & been told no. Had contrary statements made to the ad that remained posted all day. I'd rather spend my efforts with those who can provide top notch service that I am attracted and if they can't overcome race then my efforts are better spent elsewhere anyway. As a hobbyist I exercise my preferences & so do the providers. I have been denied service by African-American, Caucasian, Asian and I do believe ditched by Latina (I believe because of voice). I have also enjoyed time with them all also. Yeah I wish there was better way for us to know upfront who does and/or does not see men of color. Happy hunting.

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PostNasalDrip
Member since 3-Feb-10
519 posts		 18-Aug-10, 01:51 AM (PST)
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22. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #0
 
   Here is a suggestion.

Get invited to some mixers.
Mingle with the ladies who attend.

Develop a good reputation and rapport with them.

And go from there.

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craveme175
Member since 30-Aug-10
3 posts		 30-Aug-10, 07:49 PM (PST)
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24. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #0
 
   I know what you mean brotha. I feel the same way. It happens to me all the time. It's kind of unfortunate because we are real gentlemen just like any one else. The only difference is our skin. I will say that I have had some that have seen me despite their reservations becasue of my approach. When I asked why they are sometimes reserved they say it's because they think black guys are pimps or some ignorant black guy slapped them around. I just try not to take it personal.

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805MassageBabe 805MassageBabe rating
Member since 6-Oct-07
3049 posts, 90 feedbacks, 173 points		 30-Aug-10, 08:27 PM (PST)
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25. "RE: Somewhat Frustrating..."
In response to message #24
 
   "It's kind of unfortunate because we are real gentlemen just like any one else. The only difference is our skin...."

Yes, absolutely yes on the real gentlemen part. But I think maybe those silly be-atches are intimidated by a brotha's big trouser snake.

Amatures.
ha, ha.


xoxxo
MB

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