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Conferences > Northern California > Art of FBSM > Topic #11842
Reading Topic #11842

peachgal peachgal rating
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5087 posts, 34 feedbacks, 56 points		 19-Aug-10, 02:30 PM (PST)
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"continuing the flirting topic"
 
The last post in the thread was about providers sending a note of appreciation after a session. I just wanted to say that I think it is more likely to strike up a dialogue if the client first sends the note of appreciation. This gives the provider permission to contact. So many clients are disdainful of unsolicited contact and view it as trolling, indiscretion or marketing. If you send the thank you note first, you give her an opening that she may not otherwise see, in the interest of discretion and respecting your privacy.

Just a thought on a sunny afternoon whilst on the mend.

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Ziggy56
Member since 4-Mar-09
33 posts		 19-Aug-10, 03:11 PM (PST)
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1. "RE: continuing the flirting topic"
In response to message #0
 
My question is to providers. Do you have time for email? While I have almost 24-7 access to email the provider obviuosly may not have much time in her busy life. This gets me anxiuosly waiting for the next reply or wondering if I'm being a pest. If a couple of weeks go by I just give up.
My emails are not only for flirting but to let them know what worked or didn't work in a session in hopes of making the expierience better.

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peachgal peachgal rating
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5087 posts, 34 feedbacks, 56 points		 19-Aug-10, 04:21 PM (PST)
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2. "RE: continuing the flirting topic"
In response to message #1
 
Email does take up a lot of time, but dialogue about what worked and what did not is productive.so I would say as long as it is once in a while it is ok by me. It cannot, however, become a daily thing or always have an expectation of a same-day response.In other words, easy does it.

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oralio oralio rating
Member since 1-Dec-03
36158 posts, 126 feedbacks, 215 points		 19-Aug-10, 04:35 PM (PST)
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3. "RE: continuing the flirting topic"
In response to message #0
 
Many clients feel like losers if they email thanks to a provider.

What, "thanks for letting me pay you to get me off" ?

And they also don't want to be accused of being clingy or stalkerish.

I'm not saying most guys, but it's definitely a factor.

Be the change
you wish to see

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peachgal peachgal rating
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5087 posts, 34 feedbacks, 56 points		 19-Aug-10, 05:12 PM (PST)
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4. "RE: continuing the flirting topic"
In response to message #3
 
Wow I would not have imagined that saying thanks for such a nice time, as so many folks do, could "make" someone feel like a "loser"!my experiences with people have just been so different.It has always seemed like having a great experience and a good connection feels like win-win.No losers involved.

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peachgal peachgal rating
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5087 posts, 34 feedbacks, 56 points		 19-Aug-10, 05:18 PM (PST)
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5. "question for the ladies"
In response to message #3
 
Ladies, would a thank-you note make someone seem clingy or stalker-ish?

That has not been my feeling in the past.

Musings whilst on the mend

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Ziggy56
Member since 4-Mar-09
33 posts		 19-Aug-10, 05:37 PM (PST)
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7. "RE: question for the ladies"
In response to message #5
 
I do not share his thoughts. I'm only going to say thank you if I really felt there was a reason for it and I always appreciate the services provided. I don't see FBSM as just getting off. I take much more from a session than that or I would not bother at all. There is the physical help for sore muscles, and there is the shared intimacy you just don't get every day. And there is the imagery I try to hold on to. After a session I usually find myself with a glow and that is why I want to thank her and let her know the services are very much appreciated.

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billydetroit billydetroit rating
Member since 23-Jan-07
3032 posts, 152 feedbacks, 267 points		 20-Aug-10, 05:53 AM (PST)
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14. "RE: question for the ladies"
In response to message #5
 
>>Ladies, would a thank-you note make someone seem clingy or stalker-ish?


No way.

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FOURACES FOURACES rating
Member since 26-Mar-03
1689 posts, 29 feedbacks, 52 points		 20-Aug-10, 07:52 AM (PST)
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15. "RE: question for the ladies"
In response to message #5
 
I will frequently call a provider from my car after a good session to thank them for the nice time. I certainly don't feel creepy, stalkery or like a loser when I do and I've had feedback from more than one provider that the call made their day. It's about acknowledgement and appreciation, a simple gesture that makes both parties feel good. As peachy said, a win-win.

FA
Proud thorn in Oralio's ass

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Deliese
Member since 13-May-09
313 posts, Rate Deliese		 20-Aug-10, 10:12 AM (PST)
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16. "RE: question for the ladies"
In response to message #5
 
"Ladies, would a thank-you note make someone seem clingy or stalker-ish?"

Not at all!

I really appreciate it when a client will take the time to let me know how much they enjoyed the session. And I always respond to their email with gratitude.

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oralio oralio rating
Member since 1-Dec-03
36158 posts, 126 feedbacks, 215 points		 20-Aug-10, 04:35 PM (PST)
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20. "RE: question for the ladies"
In response to message #5
 
One note? No.

What percentage of the time does one thank you note not lead to a stream of subsequent emails?

Be the change
you wish to see

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tantrikcourtesan tantrikcourtesan rating
Member since 19-Nov-03
559 posts, 5 feedbacks, 9 points		 19-Aug-10, 05:32 PM (PST)
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6. "RE: continuing the flirting topic"
In response to message #3
 
   Oralio, I am wondering where you got your statistics to say
"Many clients feel like losers if they email thanks to a provider."

Showing gratitude and appreciation are just good manners. Perhaps
that is lacking in today's culture.

If I have a clients email I always send a quick note of
appreciation.

There are so many providers vying for the same pool of FBSM gents and standing out is vital.
Many of my past jobs involved sales & customer service, what I do
now isn't much different and how I treat my customer is an
important factor to my business.
An acknowledgment of thanks from him is "another form of intangible payment" that let's me know I've done my job well.

Elle

Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly.

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handyguy handyguy rating
Member since 22-Jun-05
429 posts, 10 feedbacks, 17 points		 20-Aug-10, 00:04 AM (PST)
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13. "RE: continuing the flirting topic"
In response to message #6
 
   I agree. Oralio sounds like he's projecting, because I can't think of a single reason why showing genuine appreciation for the time spent with her would make a guy feel like a Loser.

I always try to send a quick e-mail of thanks. One or two lines is more than adequate, though it's always nice when she beats me to the punch. That doesn't happen too often, so when it does, it indeed stands out as special and considerate.

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oralio oralio rating
Member since 1-Dec-03
36158 posts, 126 feedbacks, 215 points		 20-Aug-10, 04:31 PM (PST)
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19. "RE: continuing the flirting topic"
In response to message #13
 
LAST EDITED ON 20-Aug-10 AT 04:33 PM (PST)
 
Just because you can't think of a reason, that doesn't support the idea that I'm "projecting."

I can't think of a reason why someone would dislike Obama because he's black, yet people do.

Thank God the world isn't merely a reflection of what any one of us thinks.


Be the change
you wish to see

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YogiBear
Member since 3-Aug-07
74 posts		 19-Aug-10, 07:25 PM (PST)
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8. "RE: continuing the flirting topic"
In response to message #0
 
   Too each their own, I say. Being appreciative, respectiful and polite during their time together is a must. Part of the hobby is leaving without the need to contact each other afterwards, that's the difference between a provider and a girlfriend. However, there maybe some hobbyist that are more emotionally attached and would love that type of interaction with the favorite provider. Alas, too each their own ...

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Gnusey
Charter Member
3213 posts		 19-Aug-10, 07:46 PM (PST)
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9. "RE: continuing the flirting topic"
In response to message #8
 
The highest compliment is simply to say, "When can we do this again? Book me again for a week from today and keep on at one week intervals until I run out of money."

The rest is Hallmark Cards sentimentality.

Money talks. Bullsh*t walks.

http://bit.ly/cq188N

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Ziggy56
Member since 4-Mar-09
33 posts		 19-Aug-10, 08:46 PM (PST)
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11. "RE: continuing the flirting topic"
In response to message #9
 
I wish I had that kind of budget Gnusey.

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peachgal peachgal rating
Charter Member
5087 posts, 34 feedbacks, 56 points		 19-Aug-10, 07:46 PM (PST)
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10. "RE: continuing the flirting topic"
In response to message #8
 
LAST EDITED ON 19-Aug-10 AT 08:02 PM (PST)
 
That is exactly why I think the fella would need to make the first move!

Yep, to each his own

P.S. I like that handle yogibear

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summerrayne summerrayne rating
Member since 27-Apr-09
3152 posts, 78 feedbacks, 150 points		 19-Aug-10, 10:20 PM (PST)
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12. "RE: continuing the flirting topic"
In response to message #0
 
LAST EDITED ON 19-Aug-10 AT 10:28 PM (PST)
 
Precisely, Peach gal.

Dittos!

**Try not to contact anyone in this business unless they initiate contact!**

Those little text and email messages regarding how much the gentleman enjoyed his session are so wonderful though (I always answer back in kind)!

It's always Summer at my place! xoxo

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Violet_de_Mora Violet_de_Mora rating
Member since 10-Nov-09
258 posts, 6 feedbacks, 12 points		 20-Aug-10, 11:17 AM (PST)
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17. "RE: continuing the flirting topic"
In response to message #0
 
I love it when a client sends me an email telling me what a great time he had. It makes me even more excited about seeing them again. I especially love it when I had a really great connection with a client and they email me because I feel awkward about emailing them. I don't want guys to think I'm sending them an automatic email after a session to try and get another session out of them. I hate it when thoughtful genuine behaviors are mistaken for marketing ploys.

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JPA
Charter Member
4688 posts		 20-Aug-10, 01:08 PM (PST)
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18. "RE: continuing the flirting topic"
In response to message #17
 
>I love it when a client sends me an email telling me what a
>great time he had. It makes me even more excited about
>seeing them again. I especially love it when I had a really
>great connection with a client and they email me because I
>feel awkward about emailing them.

Violet this is just my opinion but if I had to speculate, if you had a really great connection with a client he noticed it as well. That you comment on it in a thoughtful and genuine email, I doubt he would read it as a marketing ploy. At worse he reads it as you being courteous, at best he reads it for the message's intent.

I see that as a win-draw proposition and I say go for it! Next time this situation pops up and you are unsure whether or not a communication is welcomed, you can always ask a client at the end of his appt his preferences.

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