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mattwfoley mattwfoley rating
Member since 5-Jan-07
317 posts, 4 feedbacks, 8 points		 30-Aug-10, 01:05 PM (PST)
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"In a hobby slump?"
 
   My last 7 sessions over the past two months have overall been average at best. Not to call anyone out or give away to many details but the reasons for the sessions not being very good include: feeling rushed, services previously offered no longer available, donation much higher than what services indicate they should be, difficulty in scheduling with provider.

Of the last 7 I would say I had 1 excellent session, 2 good ones, 3 average ones and one poor session.

Of the 7 I only gambled one time on the girl (that was the poor session). the 3 average ones were girls that have reviews and I have seen before. In fairness the one excellent session was also a girl I had seen before and the 2 good ones were the same provider (first two times seeing her).

I could probably extended back another month or two and struggle to come up with more than 1 good or very good session.

So, has anyone been through this before where they feel like the bang for their buck isn't there?

Are my expectations for a very good session out of whack with reality? (I know they can't all be excellent but at $$$ they should be at least good to very good everytime, right?)

Should i ween off girls I see as regulars thinking a new girl will work harder because she wants to keep my business as opposed to one who thinks she has it no matter what?

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Jiriaya Jiriaya rating
Member since 22-May-09
190 posts, 12 feedbacks, 23 points		 30-Aug-10, 02:22 PM (PST)
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1. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #0
 
With the steep admission price $$$ , you are not out of line to expect exceptional service. I feel your pain.

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BlueLantern BlueLantern rating
Member since 13-Jun-09
552 posts, 15 feedbacks, 28 points		 30-Aug-10, 02:57 PM (PST)
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2. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #0
 
Perhaps you should stop trying to analyze everything so much. Providers are human beings not some machine which pops out specific sex acts depending on how much money you put in it.

Instead take some time to converse with the lady before you get together. Trade some e-mails, talk to them in chat and get some sense if they enjoy the same things that you are looking for. You could also talk to your regulars, and see why things have changed. Was she just having an off day, or has she decided to change her menu? If you don't communicate with them, how are they supposed to know what you want?

------------------
Hope burns bright!

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NealDown NealDown rating
Member since 25-Apr-06
5799 posts, 48 feedbacks, 89 points		 30-Aug-10, 08:22 PM (PST)
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3. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #0
 
A couple of thoughts occur to me. One, you could just be a victim of hobby burnout. The cure is to cut back or stop hobbying for a couple of months. The initial rush of excitement can wear off especially if you're going every week or two. Second, most providers, IMO, are not good for repeats. Maybe a second time but the third time, in most cases, is going to be a huge letdown compared to the first one. More so than us, most providers aren't interested in having a relationship with their clients. Tough to avoid when a guy comes back repeatedly so the way to deal with the threat of impending intimacy is to cut back on the service as a way to discourage the guy from thinking that there's anything more than just the business of sex. Lastly, be more diligent in your research. If you don't have VIP membership and/or don't review the reviewers (so many BS shills and self-written reviews) than you're more apt to not choose wisely.

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noworeezm8 noworeezm8 rating
Member since 13-Nov-07
2835 posts, 104 feedbacks, 199 points		 01-Sep-10, 02:43 AM (PST)
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8. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #3
 
>> Second, most providers, IMO, are not good for repeats. <<

Absolutely agree.
For a number of reasons, including the scenario you describe.

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Aprime Aprime rating
Charter Member
1190 posts, 23 feedbacks, 44 points		 17-Sep-10, 01:09 PM (PST)
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18. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #8
 
LAST EDITED ON 17-Sep-10 AT 01:13 PM (PST)
 
>> Second, most providers, IMO, are not good for repeats. <<

Whoa, really?

I don't know about the *most* part. But going back over the past few years my observation would be that the best times started after the second or third session.

peas,
Aprime

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cons_man cons_man rating
Member since 13-Mar-06
2050 posts, 34 feedbacks, 66 points		 18-Sep-10, 12:44 PM (PST)
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21. "Beg to differ, many girls enjoy longer tern 'relationships'"
In response to message #3
 
   IF:
1. the chemistry is right, that she really likes your company
2. she senses that you're no threat (non-sticky, non-stalking)
3. amble supply of discretionary fund on your part.

Many here enjoyed such "relationships" with several for an extended period of time. (Just ask Oryx lol)

>Second, most providers, IMO, are not good for
>repeats. Maybe a second time but the third time, in most
>cases, is going to be a huge letdown compared to the first
>one. More so than us, most providers aren't interested in
>having a relationship with their clients. Tough to avoid
>when a guy comes back repeatedly so the way to deal with
>the threat of impending intimacy is to cut back on the
>service as a way to discourage the guy from thinking that
>there's anything more than just the business of sex.

Happily ever after, still!

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dj209 dj209 rating
Member since 6-Apr-10
509 posts, 24 feedbacks, 42 points		 30-Aug-10, 09:59 PM (PST)
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4. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #0
 
   Methinks you should chill out and reload your batteries. Perhaps your looking for every girl to be EVERYTHING too you. Not! If this hobby does not satisfy or make you happy, find another hobby that will. Good luck!

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mattwfoley mattwfoley rating
Member since 5-Jan-07
317 posts, 4 feedbacks, 8 points		 31-Aug-10, 00:39 AM (PST)
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5. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #4
 
   LAST EDITED ON 31-Aug-10 AT 00:41 AM (PST)
 
I think you all make valid points. Let me address a few things:

1. I do the research. Only one of the sessions was with a girl that didn't have reviews, the rest were with established providers with more than enough reviews to know who is or isn't legit. Also, 4 of the girls I saw, I had seen at minimum twice before and had MUCH better sessions with in teh past for various reasons. I understand that everyone has a bad day but for me it has been the accumulation of several weak sessions that make me wonder.

2. My expectation isn't for an above and beyond session, but at $$$ I don't want to feel rushed out the door (no one does) and if you have given me a certain menu on a consistent basis and then stop offering that, that is frustrating. I did ask her about a specific service and got a generic answer. Of course I was at full mast at the time, so it isn't the greatest conversation to have in that moment.

3. I was already thinking of taking September off from the hobby any way. Maybe the break will invigorate or reinvigorate me.

I have been hobbying for 4 years and this is the first time I have felt like I have hit a slump. I really put this out more to see if anyone had been through something similiar or had a valley like this.

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fresnopan
Member since 23-Feb-09
37 posts		 31-Aug-10, 06:50 PM (PST)
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6. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #5
 
A slump it is my friend. I'm right there with you. Between fav's retiring/moving on/dropping services/reverse grandfathered rates (still at original rate when offering lower rates for new hobbiest), etc., new unfamiliar providers, I just can get my mojo going. Time for a break.

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2now1 2now1 rating
Member since 7-Apr-07
738 posts, 14 feedbacks, 26 points		 31-Aug-10, 10:10 PM (PST)
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7. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #0
 
   Yep, I agree. You're in burnout. I'm there too. I've just started an extended break myself. I get plenty from the S/O so it should be easy enough to go a few months at least. I feel sorry for the poor girl I pick on my return though.

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ronjeremie ronjeremie rating
Member since 19-Jun-09
169 posts, 3 feedbacks, 6 points		 01-Sep-10, 09:51 AM (PST)
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9. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #7
 
   Yeah I think I'm getting there as well... started around this time last year. Tried caucasian escort and aamp...

My reason is a little different though. Here's my reason:
http://sex141.com/en/main.php

I know I know we're not in Hong Kong. But just look at the selection, quality and the price! ( $1 usd = 8 $HK)

Do I feel like paying for $$ or $$.5 when you can get the same or even better in every way for half or less? I started feeling burnout with my dinero

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Reclusive
Member since 1-Mar-09
124 posts, Rate Reclusive		 01-Sep-10, 02:37 PM (PST)
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10. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #9
 
Yes, I'm experiencing burnout because my AFT and I are getting too GD hot and it's leaving me trashed. Checking in at the monastery for a couple of weeks. Later's greater.

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Danielred
Member since 13-Apr-10
9 posts		 01-Sep-10, 07:02 PM (PST)
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11. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #0
 
   LAST EDITED ON 01-Sep-10 AT 07:04 PM (PST)
 
I hear what you're saying. I am in a slump and don't get the excitement as much anymore. I have had a few bad experiences. What pisses me off is the ladies that misadvertise the menu, change their prices and rush your service. Man, some of these ladies make more in an hour than I do in a half or whole day...not to complain about making a buck because of supply and demand, but I work hard for my money too. I have finally decided to stay with the well reviewed ladies and the 5 star ones as well. Too many flakes are getting into the business to make a fast buck, but they are'nt professional. I appreciate the honest reviews by members that leave them.

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bently99 bently99 rating
Charter Member
507 posts, 9 feedbacks, 17 points		 06-Sep-10, 09:37 AM (PST)
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12. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #0
 
   My feeling is that fewer providers give a sensual / erotic experience and without that, having sex with a beautiful woman is not much more than masturbation with a living, breathing toy. This is why more guys are "burning out".

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Reclusive
Member since 1-Mar-09
124 posts		 07-Sep-10, 11:04 AM (PST)
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13. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #12
 
I see. I must still be in the honeymoon phase of my relationship with my ATF, which began (for both of us incidentally) in June. Before we "discovered" each other though, I sure encountered enough burned-out Robots, ROBs, upsellers, and just plain thieves. How long does the "good" phase of a relationship last with any woman, though, civilian or provider, 3 months, 6 months, 9 months or a year tops? Wait and see!

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rforre1 rforre1 rating
Member since 5-Oct-07
147 posts, 2 feedbacks, 4 points		 07-Sep-10, 11:48 AM (PST)
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14. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #13
 
   The longer I hobby the harder it is to call someone new when I can call someone I already know with little risk of disappointment.

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CLingus CLingus rating
Member since 30-Apr-10
741 posts, 20 feedbacks, 35 points		 07-Sep-10, 07:46 PM (PST)
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15. "Just the opposite"
In response to message #0
 
at least for me. I can't really remember the last disappointing encounter I've had. Minimal resaerch and paying attention to some trusted sources and wham bam thank you mam, I'm a happy guy.

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eros2354 eros2354 rating
Member since 22-Mar-05
3323 posts, 12 feedbacks, 23 points		 11-Sep-10, 12:35 PM (PST)
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16. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #0
 
Sorry to remind you. The honeymoonn here is over. Time to go overseas or across someother border.

Take a break, you may of answer your own question regarding your present state of reality. Overly high expectation? Most of us high mileage mongers have been there.

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achingneed achingneed rating
Member since 19-Jul-08
443 posts, 8 feedbacks, 16 points		 11-Sep-10, 02:41 PM (PST)
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17. "Money is tighter, so expectations are higher"
In response to message #0
 
   I have a TERRIBLE time hobbying when I'm poor. Because money is worth more, and I expect more, but the girls aren't interested in delivering it. The whole thing just means more to me.

Best sessions I had was when I had more money than I knew what to do with, and I'd just walk into sessions without even asking the rate. I just let go and enjoyed, instead of thinking, "christ, I'm blowing $$$ on this, it better be good..." and then being disappointed.

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Mrdiscrete Mrdiscrete rating
Member since 20-Jan-07
238 posts, 6 feedbacks, 11 points		 17-Sep-10, 03:23 PM (PST)
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19. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #0
 
Yea you may need to take a step back, and take some time off. Reviews are one thing but I've found that I also get a LOT from the phone conversation I get when talking em. There is no sure fire way to guarantee a great encounter though. If you had one (excellent) encounter, why would you go anywhere else at least for awhile?

Considering that the common denominator is you can be a healthy thing.

What's up with the services once offered but no longer available? I can't help but wonder if "you" did something to make it no longer available?? One thing for sure, it takes two to tango.

Take a break man... this hobby is supposed to be FUN!

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tavarez tavarez rating
Member since 9-Jul-09
883 posts, 22 feedbacks, 43 points		 17-Sep-10, 03:30 PM (PST)
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20. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #0
 
   I was in a bit of a slump, but my last few sessions have been about the best ever. My pubic bone is still sore from the cg banging a kgal gave me last week. I can't recall the last time I was attacked like that. Sheesh!

tav

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gtfudoc gtfudoc rating
Member since 21-Feb-07
172 posts, 2 feedbacks, 3 points		 18-Sep-10, 07:26 PM (PST)
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22. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #0
 
   This post hits close to home. There was a time a few months back that I felt that I was having a string of bad luck with flakes and providers who did not meet up to expectation. The only thing I could really attribute the string of lack luster sessions to was I was on the hunt for new young talent or that newbie in the rough. I still stuck to the standard protocol I have been using for years such as no fake pics, well reviewed or at least a couple of reviews from identifiable handles, and no red flags during my research. It was to the point where I was saying, "Damm this sucks....maybe I should just stay away from newbies or I just need a break for a while".

Then soon after it just turned around and I have had a string of great sessions...a few I could even say were Outstanding. I did not change much other than staying away from really young newbies. Not all the sessions were stellar but they at least met my expectations and in this hobby thats all I am really asking for. So I think for me I just have to remember that it is a YMMV with everyone. You do the best you can to be safe by doing the research and going with your gut. Sometimes you strike out or squeeze out a single and other times (hopefully more times than not) you rip a double or a triple in the gap.

>> Second, most providers, IMO, are not good for repeats. <<
Not sure about this one...It has been my experience that when I find a provider I click with, who provides the services I am looking for I typically repeat 2 or 3 times. After that I have generally start looking for a new provider. Its not that the provider no longer meets my expectation or treats me any differenly its just that whole VARIETY aspect of the hobby. I may still keep the previous provider on a rotation but there is that rush you get when you find a new provider that really knocks your socks off. Although I recently met a provider who is challenging my little theory. After having seen her 3 times she is still doing it for me in a big way and may stretch the repeat string out past my usual 3 maximum....time will tell.

My recommendation would be to not quit completley but to back off on frequency and stick to well established providers. Maybe the longer time period between sessions will help to bring back that feeling of anticipation that builds when you do the research, make a selection, set the appointment , and have a great session. After a few good sessions you will more than likely feel better about taking a chance on a newbie or less known provider. Good luck....happy hunting

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xcellent
Member since 25-Jul-09
102 posts, Rate xcellent		 18-Sep-10, 09:11 PM (PST)
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23. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #0
 
   Lower your expectations. Go in for a massage only with a certified beauty and expect a massage only. If you get more you will be thrilled!

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Reclusive
Member since 1-Mar-09
124 posts		 19-Sep-10, 11:35 AM (PST)
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24. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #23
 
I did notice that after 5 increasingly intense sessions with my ATF that my enjoyment level has gone down during the last two sessions. Not that she isn't still incredible: her reviews are all stellar and I don't think I can find anyone more beautiful. Think that what is happening is 'me': I'm getting to know her too well as a person and her personal problems are getting into my head and interferring with my response to her. It also seemed like I was seeing her too frequently in an effort to bring back the old feeling of the first five sessions. Think I should back off and give her a break while I sample some variety to rekindle the flame. I also now know some troubling things in her past that led her into this lifestyle that makes it difficult to treat her as a pure object. Maybe knowing a provider too well as a person interfers with the primary goal of this hobby and turns them into a SO (significant other) with all the problems associated with a wife or GF? Maybe the old maxim holds true: The cure for one woman is another woman?

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xcellent
Member since 25-Jul-09
102 posts		 19-Sep-10, 03:38 PM (PST)
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25. "RE: In a hobby slump?"
In response to message #24
 
   I agree. I stopped seeing a provider because of other things she indicated she was into.

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